Welcome to Shakti Unleashed!

For all who aren’t aware – Shakti is a Goddess, she represents female power, form, energy. Her opposite number is Shiva – God, destroyer, male energies.

I’ve only just discovered these two concepts through an introduction to Tantra, so forgive me if my description or even understanding of both are rather superficial at present. Both embody these two complimentary forces. Yin and Yang if you like.

I’ve never ‘blogged’ before – in fact I’m a bit of a technophobe, and a bit old fashioned, in that I prefer to read from paper books than electronic ones, prefer my music still on CDs and like to talk to people on the phone rather than in chat rooms. I suppose that’s because I don’t like the idea that human communication is becoming increasingly impersonal. I think in my life time, the full 37 years I’ve been here, I have seen a shift – probably over the last 20 years. These are all diminishing: Physical face to face contacts and being able to look into a person’s eyes, hearing someone’s voice on the phone and really listening, reading the unique curves and lines of their handwriting, feeling the warmth in their embrace or the brush of their hand across yours. All these things help you connect with the soul of that person, and in doing so connect with your own. There are a lot of lonely people in the world despite our ever increasing population size.

These ‘real’ interactions are slipping away, and in letting them go I feel we are also abandoning part of our spirit – the part that needs to be nourished, cherished and recognised. This, combined with a growing trend towards screwing other people over, in and outside of relationships, can all add up to an echoing emptiness. Even people who seem to have it all, are very often hiding this same void and are secretly searching for something to fill it.

Anyway these are the primary intentions of my Blog:

• To primarily serve as a space in which I can express my own journey/path/progress/ struggles/growth through a period of depression and on going recovery from that – so I can see how far I’ve come. I may look briefly at what got me there – initial childhood sexual abuse by a male relative.
• I will reveal negative relationship patterns of behaviour that have been burnt across my life due to the above. I’ll discuss some of the men/Shivas, who I have invited onto my stage to perfectly and repeatedly play the role of ‘abuser’. I’ll talk about how I felt at the time and what impact these relationships had upon me.  Some are eminent figures within their professions, with an old rock star among their ranks.
• I will also talk about the ways I have sought to break free of these behavioural rituals that have held me down for so long and the process of learning to first form a healthier relationship with my self. I’d like to pay homage to some of the lovely men who I have welcomed into my life and proven that a relationship can be positive, loving, creative and respectful – no matter whether that relationship lasts an hour, a night, months, years or till death do us part. I’d especially like to highlight my friends and family who are the most precious things in my life.

I dare to hope that my experiences might also be of interest to others who are experiencing some level of depression, issues with relationships at any level, and whose past experiences still hurt you or hold you back in your ‘present‘ today. I write from the point of a straight woman who has relationships with men – I don’t intend this Blog to become a man-bashing space – that’s not what this is about. It’s about how human’s relate to each other in whatever context, the relationships we have with ourselves and how we can start to heal them if they’ve gone wrong. Hopefully I’ll intersperse the serious bits with some juicy stories and  humour.

Dedicated to all the lovely Shaktis and Shivas out there and all who have and continue to give and sacrifice so much in war and conflict in this 100th year since the Great War.

Remember the only time that matters is now.

PS – this Blog site is a work in progress – will try to make it pretty!